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Are You Getting in Your Own Way?

Take A Good Look In the Mirror And Ask Yourself If Your Getting In Your Own Way:

Man with grey hair looking in morror

Ask yourself this question every time you are feeling overwhelmed and chances are you will keep coming to the same conclusion.

The Big Question:

Why is it that I never have enough time to get every thing done that I have on my list?

The Big Answer:

You are getting in your own way!

So what exactly does that mean and how exactly do you knock it off?

GETTING IN YOUR OWN WAY: Three Major Factors You Should Look At Removing.

  • OVER COMMITTING
  • OVER CONTROLLING
  • OVER ANALYZING

We are going to pluck these off one by one so you can get back on track.

Over Committing:

No it’s not the same as staying committed.

Over committing is usually brought on by ego, guilt or fear (unfortunately.)

We’ll get the big fat ego out of the way first. You will notice it will come up few times in my writings.
EGO:
The ego in us will lead us to believe we are much bigger than we really are. It will put us at the top of the hill and then pitch us right back off of it when we are not paying attention to it. It’s an evil little word with a wicked backlash.

Our ego will make us over commit in an effort to have ourselves and others believe we are GREAT! Oh the gut wrench when we run out of time or forget to do that other thing we were supposed to do.
GUILT:

The guilt factor is another reason for over committing. This can be brought on by feeling obligated internally or from someone else that is placing guilt on us to do something for them right away when we really do not have the time to do it. It’s a bear to deal with and you need to learn how to say no to it.

FEAR:

This is one more tiny little thing that will put you in a position to over commit. The fear of losing your position, the fear of losing a client, the fear of losing a relationship or even the fear of losing your ego. OUCH!

OVER CONTROLLING:

This is a good one but not for everyone. There are just certain people that have  over controlling personalities and characteristics.

It’s a very tough battle to get through because this is really the mac daddy of ego to say the least. So what makes certain people over controlling?

Here it comes again. EGO,GUILT and FEAR

To have this type of control is mandatory with some people. It is the foundation that has a special type of safety attached to it. Being in control means never being vulnerable or open to pain and heart ache and is always on the top of everything or so it seems to the controller at hand.

OVER ANALYZING:

This one can set you back so far that you may never accomplish anything completely.
It will take the very breath out of what could have been a wonderful experience and drown it in doubt.

While ego and guilt do not seem to be the root of this issue; fear definitely plays a role here. Those who over analyze usually do it out of the fear of missing something or risking the chance of imperfection that may ultimately reflect a flaw in ones prideful perfection.

Hm mm, sounds like ego does slip in on this at the end of the day. Oh and guilt of putting less than perfect out there, slides in again as well.

Can you see the cycle here?

Lets make a really big effort to get you on track, organized and free of this problem.

This can be simple if you give yourself permission to drop the baggage you carry around with you and just start moving forward.

Drop the EGO Drop the Guilt and Drop the FEAR:

Over Committing:

Stop doing it! Take your time and schedule it out in specific,targeted frames.

If you plan to accomplish a task within a given amount of time that you have scheduled, stick to that time frame. Do everything in your power to not go over it. What this will do is give you a better focus on your task at hand. When you dedicate yourself to completion of a project and focus only on that project, chances are you will complete it in the time given. Be careful on giving yourself too much wiggle room in your time schedule or you may get yourself in a situation of procrastinating purely because you can tell yourself you have plenty of time. Act as if you have less time than scheduled and watch how fast you will get things done.

Do not allow interruptions unless it is an absolute emergency. Do not stop to check emails,telephone calls or text messages.

Do not stop to call a friend or colleague for advice that will lead into conversation of frivolous content. If you get stuck and need help with a stumbling block you may come across, get the information quickly from someone that can give it to you and cut it off at that. Of course always express your gratitude for the time they have taken to help but let them know up front you are on a time crunch and are looking for something specific they have the knowledge in you are seeking. Get it and keep going.

Do not allow anyone to believe you can take on an extra task if you know it will put you in a pinch. This is not good for them and it is not good for you. To have to apologize for biting off more than you can chew will only put that feeling of guilt on your shoulders.

OVER CONTROLLING:

Give yourself a break!

Allow others to shine for a change. When you give up the over controlling personality and pass the torch to someone else, you are giving so much more that you could ever imagine.

Stop and breath enough to let someone else create. If that person is not doing exactly as you would do it. GOOD FOR THEM! You may just learn something new…Now, if there is a mistake on that persons part, bring it to their attention and praise that person for a job well done but work with them to understand the reason something may not be correct and let them continue on with the task. Don’t grab it away from them out of ego and tell yourself how much better you can do it yourself. That action would be the beginning of animosity and a deteriorated relationship that could have otherwise been beneficial to both. It will also keep you from doing other important things with your time. Of course at the end of the day if you do have someone else working on a task for you and the skill level is just not there with the individual that is assigned to the task at hand, offer that person your apologies and get someone that has the right level of skill for the task. Do no keep yourself or others in the position of uncomfortable situations. Again, express gratitude for the work but you must stop the bleeding as quickly as possible.

This is not being controlling, it is being responsible for your time and respectful to the time of others.

OVER ANALYZING:

While it is good to analyze, over analyzing will keep you from accomplishing something that would have taken much less time and money. Your time is worth many things. But the old saying hold true. “TIME IS MONEY” The faster you can act on something and make a decision the faster you will earn income. Over analyzing can also lead to procrastination. Take a chance! There is a reason BETA versions are released. They are not perfect in any way shape or form but they are still released. I am not saying you should simply toss caution to the wind. What I am saying is that some of the largest companies in the world do everything they can to give their very best and even that may not be good enough for some. You are no different. You will never be as perfect as you would like to be and neither will anything else on this earth aside from nature. It can be perfectly formed or perfectly deformed.

To analyze is awesome! To over analyze is detrimental. Home in on what it is you need to do, get your self line up to take action and just take action. Get the job done weather it is perfect or not. Weather you got the best price or not. Weather you found just the right words or not. Finish the task and then go back and fix what you need to. At least get Beta 1 completed. Then go back and review to see how or what you need to fix if anything at all.

Start putting this mind set in to action today and you will begin to see a change in your daily behaviour and accomplishments.

Have a Successful Day!

Rhonda Giarraffa

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A sample text widget

Etiam pulvinar consectetur dolor sed malesuada. Ut convallis euismod dolor nec pretium. Nunc ut tristique massa.

Nam sodales mi vitae dolor ullamcorper et vulputate enim accumsan. Morbi orci magna, tincidunt vitae molestie nec, molestie at mi. Nulla nulla lorem, suscipit in posuere in, interdum non magna.